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Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Jeff Hardy made CM Punk a Superstar...

So in a new (I guess) youtube video Jeff Hardy, an EXTREMEly intoxicated Jeff Hardy goes off on an obviously instigated rant about CM Punk and takes jabs at him and the WWE (somewhat), he even goes so far as to do CM Punks wrist stretching thing and then turning it into a V-1 sign (Matt Hardy was also in the video, eating, more on that later) and his little "gun thing" and then....wait for it....he flips off the camera....oooohh, I'm telling!! But seriously, the guy behind the camera, which was probably Shannon Moore or Gregory Helms, really did that, the "Ooooohhedd" like it was risque. He then goes on to say "You can't even do that in your company anymore." My reply to that is simple: whose watching your company Jeff? And yes, I know there are those of you out there yelling at your screens about how bad WWE is right now and how low their ratings are right now, but when Superstars is only getting half of the viewers Impact is, you're not making an impact.

Then Jeff starts/repeats/whogivesashitbecauseitcameoutofhisintoxicatedretardmout a rumor about CM Punk that he HAS to take Ambien to sleep. Really jackass? The guy is so OVER with the fans that he doesn't wrestle for TWO MONTHS and they have him on TV every week. He and Chris Jericho are the two best heels of the last decade, in ANY company (and don't get your hopes up Jeff, Jericho will wrestle again... in the WWE) and the reason CM Punk is so good in the ring and on the mic is by no means your doing. We can all thank Paul Heyman and Punk's time spent under his tutiledge in OVW for that, so get off of you "high" horse and go polish that gay ass belt.

Matt Hardy, you're just a fat tool. Amy Dumas calls you every time things go bad. Yeah, and the WWE is rueing the day that you and your brother got away! Go eat another burger, dipshit.

Note: I really, REALLY want to like TNA and this post is not meant to desparage them, but godammit do they have to prove that history repeats itself this fast? They want to "beat" the WWE so badly that that is their main focus and instead of making a steadily rising product they try for the big boom. Really Bischoff? Really Hogan? Really? (Thank you Miz) The WWE is TOYING with you, they pull silly bullshit because they CAN! I guarantee that if you challenged them in the ratings, or fuck, beat them in the rating their next PPV would feature chairshots to the head, blood, and somebody getting the middle finger.

And one more thing...fuck you Jeff Hardy, Vince McMahon is the Anti-Christ of professional wrestling.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

But SHE partied too much...


WWE has fired Serena, we all know that, even though she has yet to officially wished well in her future endeavors and who knows, it could change by the time you read this. But as we, and MANY others have stated, Vince hates women. Case in point, the attached photo shows Arn Anderson enjoying a beer with...wait for it.... Joey Mercury and Luke Gallows of the Straight Edge Society!!! Hmmmm...who is the only member of the SES that isn't CM Punk NOT in the picture, I can't reca....oh yeah, Serena, of one maybe...two, Divas that apparently can actually wrestle and you fired her because she likes to have a drink...pussies. She didn't live up to her charachter...REALLY, apparently neither do Luke and Joey...oops, Joseph, but then, they don't have vaginas. So we get talentless whores (sans for Beth Phoenix and maybe Natalya) who couldn't wrestle their way out of a wet tampon wrapper while the ones with talent (Mickie James and Serena) get fired because they either like to have a drink or don't like playing second fiddle to talentless bitches just so we can have a "Piggie" James vignette for 4 weeks. Good job Vince, I'm really glad CM Punk, Miz, Jericho, Daniel Bryan, etc. don't have vaginas because 4 hours of Cena vs. HHH would get old real quick...
The above picture was taken by Sarah Smith from Melbourne, Australia during Smackdown's recent Aussie Tour.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Listen To My Roar

Ham and Eggers welcome, this week the gang takes a look at Some fascinating (read funny) current stories in the wrestling world. Like Shane McMahon's new job, Jeff Jarrett's new show and other topics of a riffing nature. Of course there is a new Royal Rumble Ranking, and we finish off 5 Best and 5 Worst with Submissions. Throw on you sunday best and put us in your ear, its the Small Package 8.
Download Link!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

New WWE Logo?


This is rumored to be the new WWE logo, that is supposedly in the works, and is set to debut on RAW's 900th episode. What do you guys think, leave us a comment or send us an email at thesmallpackage@gmail.com and let us know your opinions.

Fain's Video of the Day 8/5

One of my favorite moments ever in wrestling. Being a huge Shawn Michaels fan already, I loved this spot so much and its sooooooooo bad ass, its probably the best Sweet Chin Music Ever. Enjoy




Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Gaaaayyy


Other than Vance Archer's "Tramp Stamp", this has got to be the gayest tattoo on a wrestler, we know who you are, you don't need to get 8 inch letters with your inititals. At least he got the dates of his childrens birth and not the dates of his TNA title wins, that would've been even more fucked up.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

"Joe's gonna kill you!"


So, today or yesterday or whenthefuckever, it has come out that Samoa Joe has been "suspended indefinitely" for supposed "poor attitude and weight issues". Yeah, he's a big guy, always has been from what I remember him in ROH and his early days in TNA, but at least he dropped some of it from his time in that Main Event Mafia fiasco. Plus, he's one of you best wrestlers, and honestly one of the most over with the fans, if not THE most over with them. Put simply, the guy can go and maybe should be carrying the belt. I like RVD with the title, but he's not a "TNA guy" and I think thats what they need at the helm as champion right now. Joe has been misused and used sparringly for at least a year now, yet his match with RVD earlier last month on Impact is one of the highest rated of the year among wrestling fans, not just TNA fans, and think about this, RVD and Joe had to almost literally BEG for more than the four minutes they were originally given!


Now, I can see Joe being upset, he's been one of the biggest supporters of the company for years now and now he's being pushed aside, and not just for the ECW guys, but for everybody apparently. He felt his match with Jeff Hardy was ruined when the finish was revealed by the announcer telling everyone "30 seconds left" when Joe had asked them not to do that, and yes, even though I can't stand Jeff Hardy, that match was pretty good up until that point.


So what does Joe do now? Does he wait his time, working some indy bookings, granted I don't know if his contract allows that or not. Does he ask for his release and work some indy bookings until it blows over a la Bryan Danielson, and on that note, just imagine seeing him and Bryan Danielsson wrestle in front of 500 people and the excitement that would bring to the wrestling world. Does he ask for his release and return to ROH? I see this as the most unlikely as ROH is essentially bankrupt and it would be insane for him to go there. Does he ask for his release and attempt to sign with WWE? And if he does, how would they use him? Would the stupidly put him in FCW and try to milk another season of NXT with him as the star attraction? I kind of would want to see that, just to see Michael Cole and Matt Striker pissing themselves at the fact that he might snap and kill them. In all actuality, if he were to go to WWE he would probably work maybe a month in FCW to stay in ring shape and then debut on WWE TV, but how would they use him, although his wrestling style is fine for TV-PG, his "gimmick" is not and I feel he would be used as a mid-carder like Christian, but man would they have some great matches, if WWE would let them.


Discuss....
Edit: It is now said that his suspension is only for one month, but this should still be discussed, because if he's not happy, shit could go down!